I know what you are thinking. Of course not. We all know that. But do we really? Do we live this truth day in and day out? In real life?
I can go on and on telling you about the times I have tried to prove my worth to others. How intelligent I am. Trying to prove how kind I am, worthy, etc., over and over again. You know, I think we have all done it. Acceptance is something that we all seek in one way or another. We have all done things to prove our worth or even our happiness to others. Look at how you post on social media and the stories you choose to tell others. Now look at what you choose not to post or tell. Why do we do this?
Have you ever gotten into a relationship just to prove to others that you are wanted and/or lovable? What about purchasing things that you cannot truly afford just to show others that you can rock the latest trends? I mean, why do we do these things? Some people will bend over backwards to have or be something that they truly aren’t? Why put so much into that?
Think about this…if you did get someone to like you the way you were. You know, when you had changed something about yourself to get them to like you. Are you really winning? You are going to have to be that person all of the time or something really negative can happen when they find out about the real you. Don’t you want authentic connections? We should not focus on the amount of friends or followers we have. I, myself, care more about authentic connection and creating a space where we can be our absolute selves. A place where we are safe and vulnerable knowing we will not be judged.
We have nothing to prove to anyone but ourselves. Period.
We have to care more about what we think of ourselves than what others think of us. Seriously. What others think of us is their issue, not ours. It is not your job to make sure that others find you fun, attractive, worthy, or intelligent.
I mean, yes, there are times where we do have to show them what we are working with. When we have to do a try-out, or an interview. Or maybe when we are doing a job at work or on a first date. We do have to be who we are and shine! As the real you, of course. Even then, you don’t want to be a different you because that person is not going to last either, right? But I am not talking about those times. This is about changing who you are to prove something to others in life in general. Just being someone completely different.
You are in control
If you are not happy, do the things that will help you get there, truly. People may not be happy with you now…or when you get to where you want to be, that is on them. You have to prove to yourself that you have a purpose and you can be happy. Who is the one who has to define how you feel about yourself and not be swayed by what others think about you? YOU! Ask yourself if you are happy, at peace, fulfilled, or enjoying life. You have a job to be sure that you feel what you want to feel and do what is best for you. It is not your job to convince anyone that you are doing those things.
We get to define what is safe and beneficial for us. The opportunity to feel happy and fulfilled with our lives will be defined and approved by us if we live in our power. When you feel fulfilled and happy in your life, you have made it. That is success or a least one kind of success. And you don’t have to show and prove that to anyone else. It’s your life. You have control of what happens in it. Although we love to have support, we do not need approval to move forward in it.
I made up my mind
I have made a lot of moves in my life that were questioned by friends and loved ones. Changed my mind about doing some of those things because of what they had to say about them, one of them was blogging! Well, the moment that I felt that what I was doing was good for me, personally, and my family, I picked those things back up and have never been happier.
Now, I do what I want without apologies and I am happy. I wear what I want even when I see the double takes or noses turn up. Still homeschool my son even though I know friends and family have things to say about it. It was one of the scariest moves I have ever made but I have always had my son’s education in my hands even when he was in school.
So, how many times have you done something (or not done something) to prove something about yourself to another person? Or even to the internet world ?
How far have you gone to prove to others that you are attractive, happy, likable, fun or what have you? I have to admit that I have done it plenty of times. To no avail. It was such an arresting feeling when I had to keep up with being someone that I was not. You don’t have to prove anything to them. Do not turn your back on what makes you happy to appease someone else. They wouldn’t do it for you.
You don’t have to prove anything
Say it with me, you don’t have to prove anything to anyone but yourself! Let them think what they want to think. Go ahead, let them feel and assume what they want to. Let them talk! You are the only one who has to live through your choices and in your truth. That person that you see in the mirror every morning is only one that will be putting in the real work to find your happiness, worth, and whatever else you are looking for in this life.
You don’t have to prove your capabilities, worth, or happiness to anyone. “The proof is on the pudding” is what they say. My idea is that the pudding is what you serve them. So it is your choice what they taste. The only way that pudding will taste the same every time is if you give them what you are truly made of…the real ingredients.
Be free and actually be exactly everything that you want to be. You can be all that you, at one time, pretended to be, in real life. That is totally up to you.
Love and Light…