There are things that hold us back. They hold us back from applying for a certain job, talking to our boss about a raise. We hesitate to start doing something we are passionate about or talking to that person that we have had our eye on because of them. What about finally getting up and going to the gym or just to take a walk? Finally going out on a date or out with friends and you talk yourself out of it because of them. You know what they are…limiting beliefs. We all have them.
Have you ever found yourself saying, “I am not smart enough to do that job.” or “I am not lovable”, “I am not funny enough”. “pretty enough”, or “I will never be good enough to have what I want”. In some form or another, we have all found ourselves in this space of doubt. If you haven’t, I need to know your secret. I am getting better at reframing those thoughts…I am still a work in progress though.
Limiting beliefs are convictions, a belief, or a state of mind that we think to be true that limits us in some way. It could be about you personally, how you interact with another person, or with how the world works. It can have so many negative effects on you and keep you making good choices or taking on new opportunities to name a few things.
Some may think that it is as easy as just believe in yourself and think positive. When we have been feeding the same things to ourselves for a long period of time, it will take a little more than a few words to be helpful. As I work on myself and help others through my coaching to get past their limiting beliefs, I look at this thought with curiosity.
What if I am wrong about not being smart enough? Do you have any proof that you are not good enough, pretty enough, funny enough, or worthy enough for what it is you desire? More than likely, this is not true.
Why do we think that the person down the street can have it all, but we can’t? How is it that everyone else can have that raise, that job, those funds, that look, but not you? Why not you?!
why not you?
I have no idea what causes limiting beliefs, but there have been arguments saying that we are not raised to be open-minded. We have inherent biases that cause us to only desire agreeable information. There are also family beliefs that were instilled in us, our education and experiences also play a part. What have we been told about ourselves? From others and what we tell ourselves. What part of that information do we believe and take ownership of?
Right here, where we are. Where they say that we can be anyone we want to be….why not you? I mean, someone is going to win. Someone is going to finally be happy, find the love of their life, have their dream job. If someone is going to travel the world, have financially freedom, and live an incredible life….why not you?
Think about it. Someone out there has all they dreamt about having. There is another person out there that is working on their dream. Guess what, someone is out there thinking of a master plan to begin the journey toward their dream. Why not you? Why can’t one of these “someones” be YOU?
What if you are wrong about not being smart enough, good enough, or worthy? What if?
This is that question I have been asking when I find myself sitting in one of my limiting beliefs. In a moment of transparency, I used to have a big problem with limiting beliefs and it kept me from really and truly being happy with my life. When I learned to stop warring with myself about who I really am and who I want to be, things have changed so much. I don’t have everything that I have dreamed of having yet but I can’t lie, I am definitely living a dream!
Our limiting beliefs put us in corners that we make for ourselves and most of the time, they are completely false. They can keep you stuck in a negative state of mind and keep you from living life to its fullest.
how to overcome limiting beliefs
For one, we should try to minimize. I know that sounds a little different but embracing minimalism can help you rid yourself of untrue beliefs that are holding you back. With minimalism, you are concentrating on honesty, getting clarity, and detaching yourself from material things. It is all about mindset and resisting the idea of fitting in and peer pressure. It will surprise you how much a well-organized environment could improve your mental health and help you gain more clarity.
I also think that we can stand to be a little more open-minded. If we begin to approach things with curiosity instead of judgment, we are more likely to explore the world around us and dare to get out of our comfort zone. If we do more of this, the curiosity will create more opportunities for us to learn about what other’s believe and observe new ideas.
Counseling or coaching may be necessary in some cases. Limiting beliefs could trigger anxiety or depression in some and may need a little deeper looking that just our own.
Meditation has definitely become a part of my morning routine and it is something that I need now that it has become a habit. Beliefs originate from thoughts from others or ourselves that worm their way into our brains as truth. We can stand to try to tackle our thought and reframe our thinking to give us the truth so that we can honestly be who we are.
Doing some personal development is always great and important in the war against these limiting beliefs. It helps to increase self-awareness and aid in overcoming weaknesses. You can read books, listen to podcasts, be coached, journal, set goals and get accountability, or many other ways to chip away at those limiting beliefs and become a stronger you.
I love using positive affirmations often. They help to improve self-esteem and put truth into yourself and out in the universe. They force you to speak about yourself in a positive way and after a while, you will hopefully believe what you have been telling yourself. Kind of the same way you began to believe those limiting beliefs you now carry.
Wrapping it up
We live in a world that is full of too many beliefs to count. As long as there are many people, that will always be the case. We do have to be mindful of what beliefs we take in as our own. What are you agreeing with? Is it something that helps you work on being a greater you? We want to live the life we have always dreamed of, after all right? Any belief that is keeping you from living that life, is a limiting one and it is time for it to go!