You Don’t Have To Clap Back!

ClapbackBefore I found my Peace, I used to be a control freak. Yup, it’s true!!

For one, I sometimes do take pride in having a Type A personality. When I let that run wild, I believe that I held myself back from enjoying life and truly being happy.

Clapback1Finally, one day it hit me(over and over again) that I do not need to have complete control over everything in my life! And honestly, I have accepted that not everything in my life needs to be controlled. There…I said it. Even better than that, not everything warrants our energy or a reaction at all.

A lot of us spend plenty of time giving our energy over to things that we cannot control or if you are a Type A personality, we are reacting to things that challenge our minds. We cannot control the fact that we did not get the promotion, someone giving us an attitude, a client canceling at the last minute, or an Uber driver making the wrong turn. Those things are completely out of our control, yet we sometimes find ourselves stressing out over them. There we are getting frustrated because things didn’t go our way and BOOM we give our energy over to people and situations that don’t deserve it.

What I have come to realize is I just do not need to have a reaction for everything that happens. I do not have to react to everything and everybody that bothers me, to every situation that unfolds unfavorably in front of me or when people treat me unfairly. What did Michelle Obama say? “When they go low, we go high”….that is me…trying to live definingyourself3above it all.

Of course, I am not ok when these things happen, but it does not mean that they deserve a reaction or my valuable energy. When we react, does it ever change the outcome? Most of the time it doesn’t. It does change the energy that flows through us and changes who we are and/or are striving to be.

My desire is to be at peace. Peace is something that we should all strive for. Stop feeling like you have to react to everything. That is where we find our inner peace. Stop clapping back at life! For real!! Now that I have started, I feel like it is my superpower.

If all it takes is to stop reacting to every single thing…do that! Stop clapping back! All inner peace is, is that no matter what is going on outside of you, you have unconditional Clapback2confidence that all will be ok. When you are at peace, you still have thoughts, things still happen…you just don’t react to them. Of course, you may respond to them but responding and reacting are two different things. Don’t let things consume you. Don’t give your energy away to overthinking.

Things may frustrate you, people may annoy you, you may be disappointed in where you are in your career right now…No need to react. How you react to what happens in your life is EVERYTHING…

Life is not about knowing everything

Life is not about controlling every outcome in your life or fighting and always getting your way. It is about looking for answers and accepting what you don’t know when you don’t know it. It is about accepting that there are still things that we are in search of. IMG_0605

While we are searching, life is gonna be crazy. The twists and turns, failures, rejections and inconveniences…but know that you can still find peace if you choose to accept the moments as temporary because they are. And guess what? Temporary things do not always deserve our energy or a reaction.

There is peace in that alone. I found some. Hope you find yours.

Feed Me: Baked Eggs with Bacon

bakedeggs1So I am in this new fancy kitchen of mine so I have been trying to make fancy food. I seriously have been wearing my little apron and everything acting like I am on Iron Chef or something. I am trying new, healthier dishes, trying new ingredients…it has been fun!

 

So it is breakfast time and you don’t have time to stand over the stove to fix your eggs and bacon…you have to try this.

I have giant children in my house and if you are like me, you have to make extra. It is a quick and easy prep and you can get dressed and have breakfast ready on those crazy days.

You will need:

  • 8 Large eggs
  • 6 cooked bacon slicesbakedeggs3
  • 1/2 tsp salt
  • 1/4 tsp black pepper
  • 2 tsp fresh dill
  • 2 tsp fresh parsley
  • 1/4 cup shredded cheddar cheese
  • 1/2 cup heavy whipping cream

Preheat oven to 425. Stir all of the dry ingredients together in a large mixing bowl. In an ovenproof skillet, add the whipping cream and the dry ingredients together and simmer over medium-low heat. Break eggs into the mixture.

Bake until the whites of the eggs are set and the yolks are to your desired doneness. You can break the yolks or scramble the eggs if you prefer. Sprinkle the dish with the bacon and cheddar cheese. Serve with some toast and enjoy!

bakedeggsTry not to overcook. Eggs continue to cook after they are removed from the heat so be careful.

You can also make this dish with egg whites and spinach…my favorite!

Have a Good Morning!

Just Blessed

blessed1We spend so much time thinking about what we don’t have…it is time to really take a look at what we do have.

The truth is, we are truly BLESSED

I wake up every morning and see the sun and feel the fan blowing on my skin and I think to myself…He isn’t through with me yet! I am alive, I am well, I am loved, I am Blessed!

We sometimes take advantage of the fact that we have made it to the next day. Every day is a gift and we need to honor that by living…truly living that day at our best and on purpose. We wake up and know that our heart is beating…that is a reminder of a blessing and we should take care of our heart so it can continue to take care of us.

Take your time acknowledging your body when you wake…

Your eyes let you know that you still have a vision. You can see what is possible and youblessed4 have the ability to go places, not just the places you physically go every day, but the places that you have only dreamed of going. Our legs move us and if yours are working today, you can get up and go…you can leave! You can go in any direction you choose. Our lungs are filling with air and they remind us that we are alive and breathing…growing! Think of who you are. You are funny, talented, you love hard, you work hard, you have a great imagination and creativity, you are empathetic, and have great insight. You add value to others and you work on you every day…right? Having all of that brings good people and unique experiences into your life.

See, you are Blessed!

blessed3Ok, I know that there are other things happening in our lives though, I know, trust me. We have to believe that even in our hard times, even when you feel there is no hope, even when we cannot see our way through a thing…we are STILL blessed.

These trials are lessons for us. The failures and disappointments, the lost loves, frustrations, confusion, and the diagnosis…all lessons. Without lessons, where would we be? Would we have conviction, values, vision or emotion? We are blessed to have lessons that remind us of who we are…they also shape us into who we are to be. We also get to see who we do not want to be. We are blessed to have lessons. We get to realize our bad habits and to see when we have lost our empathy for others. Our lessons are also teaching us when we should walk away from bad habits, people and situations that do not serve us. We cannot grow without lessons!

Lessons heal us!!

When we receive those lessons, no matter how long it takes, they show us that we can come back from anything. We can find our footing and those hardened hearts can be made soft again. We can see the beauty in others and in ourselves again as well as the experiences we have going forward. All of the cracks that were found in our lives and blessed2believed to be too big can be fixed.

This morning when I woke up, I saw light..the sun, I immediately thank God for another opportunity to get it right. That was before I touched my phone, to-do list or the tv…just to be present with myself and my God and make sure that all was right within my heart. Just being alive at that moment meant everything to me. Every day begins the same for me.  I don’t spend time thinking about what I have to do, people I have to see or talk to, I don’t judge myself…nothing like that. I just BE…in the moment.

I work on keeping my mind on my blessing throughout the day. Of course, life does jump in there and put other things on my mind but we can find our blessing in every moment if we just stop and think about what we are thinking about. (repeat that one to yourself)

Just in case you do not see the blessings…

  • You have a roof over your head
  • You have enough money to supply your needs.
  • You have people that love you. There are people out there that you haven’t met yet that are going to love you and open your heart even more.
  • You have your health, even if it’s not optimal. You can always work on improving what you have the ability to improve. Thank all of your body parts for working to the best of their ability to keep you going.
  • You have hobbies, passions, and interests that can fill your heart with joy.

blessedThe best one is the witness of the first breath that we are aware of each morning and the sunshine to light the day. Be aware of it when things are good, but make sure you really pay attention when you are feeling down or going through. When you do, all of the things that you are worried about, all of the weight that you are carrying, the failures, the disappointments…those things will seem distant when you are reflecting on the abundance around you.

 

Honey–Beauty Tips

honeySo in this ever-growing and changing beauty world, there are some old tricks that will never die. I use honey for a lot of things, especially in addition to my regular beauty regimen when my body needs some extra loving. Raw honey has anti-microbial, antiseptic, and anti-bacterial properties. It also speeds up the healing process and prevents infection. So here are some uses for honey to add to your nighttime routine for a healthier, more beautiful you…honey3

  • Winter is coming and that means our lips are going to need a little extra attention. For dry lips, I exfoliate with a thin layer of honey and sugar before I go to bed. Follow with Laneige Lip Sleeping Mask and I wake up with soft, smooth lips.
  • If you have problems with acne, which I do occasionally, you can apply raw honey to the affected area and cover it with a bandaid. Leave it overnight and just rinse in the morning. Enzymes in the honey will draw out fluid, drying it out.
  • honey1Winter also brings dry hair for some. You can mix raw honey with some olive oil or coconut oil and wrap your hair up overnight. This will help to add moisture to your hair.
  • For beautiful glowing skin, this trick has been awesome for me. I have to skip applying it to my nose because my nose is an over-achiever in the department of making oil so I just miss my nose. Mix one part raw honey and two parts aloe vera gel. Apply this on your face before you go to bed.
  • You can use honey for scars too! Just apply a thin layer of raw, organic honey and leave it on the scar overnight.
  • Do you have blackheads? Mix some honey and lemon juice and apply it to the affected area.

The reason why these are part of my nighttime self-care is that nighttime is when we work on repairing and rejuvenating our skin. Our skin needs to be nourished and nighttime is when we should address our skin issues, like antiaging and acne.IMG_5805

Be sure that you are purchasing raw honey to receive the full benefits. Raw honey contains the beneficial compounds associated with the healing and health benefits associated with this organic food. Other benefits of raw honey are that it boosts your energy levels, helps you fall asleep faster, cut and burn treatment, treat fever blisters, soothes acid reflux, aids in digestion, boosts your immune system, hangovers, and sinus issues to name just a few.

So let’s thank the bees for hooking us up and get all of the benefits of honey that we can.

 

Beauty Bit: Jade Roller

jaderollerSo I am always looking for new ways to help me beat the aging clock. Not bragging or anything, but I do not look my age at all and I want to keep it that way! I mean, I am 46 years old with a son that just turned 26…I still can’t believe that. Anyway, I make sure that I have a morning routine and a night routine and I try to add different things to them to shock my skin and keep the most youthful look I can.

I recently walked around in Marshall’s and saw the facial rollers. I looked up the different varieties and what their benefits to the skin are so that I could choose what would best benefit me if I wanted to try it at all. I chose the green jade roller for now, but I definitely want to getIMG_4178 my hands on the rose quartz next.

The Jade roller is a trending tool that had me wondering if it could do anything to help me ward off looking like I am almost 50 years old. I have been using it as part of my nighttime routine for 2 months now and I have to say that the benefits are many and I love it!

Jade rollers have been a part of Chinese skincare routines since the 7th century. It is like a mini face massager and it is believed to have healing and protective benefits for the skin. They are made out of green jade stone and have a rolling piece and some have a smaller roller on the other end for reaching smaller areas on the face.

jaderoller2I put my jade roller in the refrigerator because I like it cold and it feels refreshing. My night routine is washing my face, my witch hazel, and I use Drunk Elephant’s night duo…then I apply the jade roller to the mix.  It helps with circulation and helps the oils and serums that you apply to reach a deeper level in your skin. I just roll that puppy up and down,  side to side on my face, working around the contours. I also read in a few places that the jade roller can help with lymph drainage if you start rolling from your nose and outward to the sides of your face, middle of your chin towards your ears, and the top of your neck and rolling down towards your chest. This path is said to help detoxify your skin. I have only done this method a few times so I am not sure yet how much it helps.

The benefits?

IMG_4172

  • reduces inflammation and puffiness of the skin
  • reduces the appearance of circles under your eyes (especially if the roller is cold)
  • stimulates the  lymphatic system and blood circulation
  • brightens your complexion
  • tightens pores
  • reduces the appearance of fine lines
  • allows your skincare products to penetrate your skin deeper

I use my jade roller as a part of my nighttime skincare routine because it always makes my skin feel calm and cool. You can find a jade roller in most places where skincare products are found like Ulta or Sephora, and Amazon of course. I did read that the best jade roller to buy is one made of pure Xiuyan jade, which is what I purchased.

Seriously, try it out! I have my green jade roller, but I am ready to try the rose quartz and see what the difference will be in my skin. Happy rolling!!!

4 Reasons You Should Be Picky

picky1We cannot be afraid to say no! I have learned over the years to be choosy about saying yes. You have to trust yourself. I am not saying that you have to turn down every new opportunity that comes your way. Know your comfort zone and know the difference between stepping out of it and feeding bad habits.

 

Why should you be picky?

  1. You get what you give. Think about it. If you hate your job, you won’t be productive, have a good relationship with your co-workers, you won’t care if you are on time, and you won’t be fighting for a promotion anytime soon. If you are going into something doing half-ass work, you are going to get half-ass results. If picky3you don’t want that for yourself, make the change…trust yourself! Quit…break up…or whateva! I know it sounds easy, but being picky will be to your benefit in the long run. It is not enough to want what you believe you deserve, you have to position yourself for it.
  2. You know what makes you happy. If you don’t, you better get alone with you and find out! What you DO know is what won’t make you happy so you can’t start there. If you want a banking career, it is probably not the best idea to accept a job being a teacher. Being picky about the jobs youpicky4 accept or the company you keep will impact your happiness. Think about how much time and energy those facets of your life use.
  3. You will not be satisfied with being comfortable for long.  Sometimes it is hard to determine whether you are just comfortable doing something or if it truly satisfies you. A lot of times in relationships, people settle for someone they believe has the same interests, but the person is comfortable with who they are and they do not push them to grow as a person. Those kinds of people may be good people, but not necessarily good for you if you want to grow. Just saying….don’t date down. In the end, it won’t be worth it. There is someone out there that can help make you apicky5 better person, they just aren’t easy to find. If we are talking about employment, a good salary with a few perks, but they don’t challenge you or have room for growth may work for you for a moment, but you will lose your fire and zest for climbing the latter. Stay hungry for what you want…then go get it when it reveals itself.
  4. Environment is everything! Your environment does shape you. These are your friends, family…..your people, are the ones that have a huge impact on your life. You have to hang with people that are going in the direction that you are headed. I heard it said somewhere that if you are the smartest person in the room, you are in the wrong room! If that isn’t the truth!! We don’t have to completely cut ties with people that don’t have that going on but we do have to be mindful of how much time we put into those relationships…especially if it feels like they are impeding your growth. Keep your standards high…

picky2It is never too late to start planting seeds for the future you want. We all have the power to alter what we experience in this life. That is an amazing thing!! Like I said, we are not shutting every new opportunity down, but we should be mindful and picky about what we let enter our world. Know your comfort zone and avoid feeding bad habits. Getting to know you and know what choices will keep you on track for the future you want. Trust yourself and move forward.

No Need to Feel Guilty

guiltyMy son and I had a conversation recently and he was talking about how he felt guilty for not being where he thought he should be at his age. I knew how he felt because when I sit down to think about where I could be if I had only did this, or started earlier, or not listened to so and so… I totally understand, yet now, I realize that I am right where I am supposed to be. I am content in my space and working my way toward my next one.

It really doesn’t matter how many times you have felt it, how long ago it was, the guilt sometimes still lingers. You feel bad about the setbacks, the curveballs, the failures that you bought on yourself…some of those choices may still hurt you today.

If you’re anything like me, you have tried several times to revamp your schedule, read aguilty2 lot of self-help books, blogs, and magazines. Did you think it was a great idea to start waking up an hour earlier like I did? Did you cut people and things out of your life…or maybe you started journaling, meditating, taking walks, or eating healthier. So…how is life looking for you? Pretty good right? But I am going to honest…inside, I still sometimes feel that even with all of those “checked boxes”, there is an unfinished, unchecked box that will finally put me on top.

I understand that feeling of incompleteness when you see a friend living the dream and you are not quite where they are. Especially with my blogging. It’s been over a year and I don’t quite have the traction I wanted but I have faith and I am researching and watching others work. I believe that when it is my time…it will be MY time!

guilty1Yes, you have changed so much about your life and you still feel like your life isn’t “dreamy” enough and admired by all. You haven’t gotten down to the size you wanted, wrote that book, paid off all of your bills. or still at that job you hate. I still have to work on getting up early but still getting enough sleep. I am nice to people but I have to admit that my thoughts are not always as nice. I need to work on that too! We all try our best, but we are still getting average results. This is true but we cannot stop hoping and believing that we can have what we have envisioned if it lines up.

Change is not going to happen overnight for many of us. There are steps we are going to have to take and it may get messy. There isn’t much that another person can tell you to guilty3do because your moves happen in your power…not theirs. Things can and will get better, in time. Maybe not in the timing you would like, but they will. You will walk in the dark, over the hills and in the valleys…but as long as you continue to go forward, you end up miles away from the guilt you felt for not being there already. And celebrate every mile because there are times when just taking one step will take a lot out of you. You will only get to your next stop when you are ready. Getting there may mean letting go of the comforts of where you are. Piece by piece, step by step, mile by mile…just move forward… and move without forcing yourself…when you are ready.

You woke up this morning and you planned to do the best you can. You are taking one step at a time. You are strong, your heart is beating. Just by being alive, you are making someone’s day! They are smiling and at peace because they have access to you. Your brain is functioning and you have passion. Your passion says a lot about you even when you have nothing to say.

Guilt may be chasing after you but look at you! You are still moving forward! Guilt has been whispering in your ear that you are hopeless and helpless but there you are, helping others. Your life means something. You are doing enough….you are enough!

guilty5Don’t let guilt ruin how you feel. You don’t need a certain “checklist” to look at to see if you are living a meaningful life. You are doing what you “should” be doing. Do the things that matter the most at that moment. You will accomplish what you ultimately want to …in time. You are not behind! You are on the path that was fashioned for you. You may not be the greatest, richest, smartest, or sexiest person in the world, but you are the greatest at being YOU! Your life is not perfect, but it is yours and it is not the catastrophe that you sometimes tell yourself that it is.

Speak life into your situations. Search for the good and forget about feeling guilty for where you are. If you focus on that, you cannot see the light on the other side of the tunnel. You are more than the titles you have, your degrees and other accomplishments. You are more than what people or your past says about you.guilty4

Think about what you have done, what you have been through. You are a survivor, a warrior, a lover, you are adventurous, a teacher, an influencer…you are a beautiful soul that is open to everything, you are ever-changing, winning…and you are NOT a quitter! You are who you are. You are exactly where you are supposed to be.