Beauty Bit: Jade Roller

jaderollerSo I am always looking for new ways to help me beat the aging clock. Not bragging or anything, but I do not look my age at all and I want to keep it that way! I mean, I am 46 years old with a son that just turned 26…I still can’t believe that. Anyway, I make sure that I have a morning routine and a night routine and I try to add different things to them to shock my skin and keep the most youthful look I can.

I recently walked around in Marshall’s and saw the facial rollers. I looked up the different varieties and what their benefits to the skin are so that I could choose what would best benefit me if I wanted to try it at all. I chose the green jade roller for now, but I definitely want to getIMG_4178 my hands on the rose quartz next.

The Jade roller is a trending tool that had me wondering if it could do anything to help me ward off looking like I am almost 50 years old. I have been using it as part of my nighttime routine for 2 months now and I have to say that the benefits are many and I love it!

Jade rollers have been a part of Chinese skincare routines since the 7th century. It is like a mini face massager and it is believed to have healing and protective benefits for the skin. They are made out of green jade stone and have a rolling piece and some have a smaller roller on the other end for reaching smaller areas on the face.

jaderoller2I put my jade roller in the refrigerator because I like it cold and it feels refreshing. My night routine is washing my face, my witch hazel, and I use Drunk Elephant’s night duo…then I apply the jade roller to the mix.  It helps with circulation and helps the oils and serums that you apply to reach a deeper level in your skin. I just roll that puppy up and down,  side to side on my face, working around the contours. I also read in a few places that the jade roller can help with lymph drainage if you start rolling from your nose and outward to the sides of your face, middle of your chin towards your ears, and the top of your neck and rolling down towards your chest. This path is said to help detoxify your skin. I have only done this method a few times so I am not sure yet how much it helps.

The benefits?

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  • reduces inflammation and puffiness of the skin
  • reduces the appearance of circles under your eyes (especially if the roller is cold)
  • stimulates the  lymphatic system and blood circulation
  • brightens your complexion
  • tightens pores
  • reduces the appearance of fine lines
  • allows your skincare products to penetrate your skin deeper

I use my jade roller as a part of my nighttime skincare routine because it always makes my skin feel calm and cool. You can find a jade roller in most places where skincare products are found like Ulta or Sephora, and Amazon of course. I did read that the best jade roller to buy is one made of pure Xiuyan jade, which is what I purchased.

Seriously, try it out! I have my green jade roller, but I am ready to try the rose quartz and see what the difference will be in my skin. Happy rolling!!!

I Want MORE!

iwantmore1We have all heard the saying, “less is more”, right? When it is said, the person is most likely referring to getting rid of things in life. Decreasing items, activities, people or just doing less. Maybe throwing away clothes or excess things you own, maybe even removing habits that you see as negatives in your life and they do not serve the good in you.

I am all for it! Actually, I am working on ridding myself of some material things in my home that I am not using but they are taking up space. After seeing how much cleaner my home is getting, for some reason it makes me feel better and I want MORE!!!! I am all for that minimalist movement. I feel like not only does it make my surroundings lookIMG_2071 good, but I feel like I can think more clearly. I wonder if that happens to everyone…

The “Less is more” mentality is used on every part of our day. We focus on having less anxiety, having less debt, not over-thinking, living with less regret, and having fewer friends to name a few. Everyone wants fewer of all of those things, but what if we focused on the “MORE” in our lives?

Putting all of our focus on what we don’t want does not help us get what we do want. If we are doing this, we are giving all of our time and energy on the removal of people, things and our mindset. This is pretty negative to me! This is us thinking about the “take away”. Concentrating on the subtractions…I do not want to give too much time to that. Remember what you focus on, grows!

I spent a lot of time in my younger years focusing on what I did not want in my life, and honestly, those things became monsters! They were bigger than anything I wanted to have.  I had to stop focusing on things that would keep me where I was, or drew me back in life, even if it’s was to remove them…That is giving it energy…life.

IMG_3009I am working on freeing myself from that way of thinking and focusing on what I want MORE of. I mean, how can we expect to create the life we want or become the person we imagine if we only focus on what we don’t like? Or what we don’t want? I am putting my focus on what and who I want to add to life. Doing that, I am acknowledging what I want to subtract but I am not feeding “the monster” by giving it all of my focus. I am also making a choice to add experiences and enjoying them rather than focusing on the negative. Being open to what we can have will be more enjoyable than focusing on what we don’t.

That has been a mind-blowing shift in my life so far…I feel so much lighter! There are fewer should’ve, would’ve, could’ve times when we focus on what we would like MORE of. Don’t pray for another job, another lover, or to live somewhere else. Look at where you are and how far you have come…embrace this space! Smile while you think about the good qualities you have…just focus on what you can do to add MORE into the life you have now. What is supposed to be yours, will be yours if you and it lines up with your given destiny so why stress?

When we spend time thinking about subtracting, it closes us off to MORE and makes ustrysomethingnew think small. If we focus on the things we want to add, we are focusing on the upside, on the current and possible growth in our lives. I am not saying acknowledging the negative is bad. We have to be open to seeing it and growing from it. Focusing on it will not help us grow or give us feel-good feelings so we should not dwell there. More positive leads to less and less negative.

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We are still going to get hurt by a person, relationship or life experience. Instead of looking at this and living in the hurt or pain, focus on the lessons, the good that did happen, focusing on bringing the right people that will bring the right energy into your life. Are you still having negative thoughts? Do not try to suppress them! I just think MORE about the positive things that I see and feel and the things that I am grateful for. 

Because I am a plus-size beauty, I get anxiety when it is time to purchase clothes….yes I do! But instead of staying with the feeling, I am talking to myself MORE (not answering back though 😉 ) about the parts of me that I love and reassuring myself that the rest of me is just as beautiful. I am not the most confident woman when it comes to the physical me and I am working on not focusing on the parts of me that I feel aren’t so sexy or the insecurity of all that thinking. I am a work in progress trying to be MORE accepting of me…all of me. There is more to my “sexy” than meets the eye.

That is where I wanna put my focus…

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Comparison Can Bring You, Joy, Too!

goodcomparison4Sometimes we watch people “come up” and the green-eyed monster shows up on our shoulders making us wonder why they are getting the things that we have been longing for. Friends are getting new jobs, new lovers, getting engaged or married, having babies, buying nice things, becoming famous, getting promoted and/or getting recognized.

We can look at what is going on in their lives and not feel negative emotions. It’s possible! You can admire what you see happening in their lives without questioning your own success. Economists and psychologists call it downward comparison.  If you compare upward about things you can’t change, then you’re just going to feel stuck. No Bueno!

Comparing ourselves to others does not have to be an unhealthy, negative practice. It doesn’t have to be self-loathing or full of jealousy. Comparing yourself can be goodcomparisonproductive…say whaaaaaaat?!

There are pros and cons to this thing right? It is not good if we are trying to gain a sense of superiority or avoiding challenging yourself to do better. Or comparison can remind us of our own fortune…it serves as a reality check.

It can motivate us, give a different perspective, and make us appreciate our lives.  Comparison can lead to some incredible breakthroughs.

I know this sounds completely unusual. The internet and popular opinion say that we should stop comparing ourselves to others. There are so so many articles out there that tell you why you shouldn’t compare…and I agree with their points. This is just another way to look at a comparison.

goodcomparison1Honestly, we should definitely delight in the success, well-being, and growth of our loved ones. A little comparison can cause a light to go off in your head…your life and motivate you to not only aim higher but to put some action to it. Celebrating others and comparing may help us see where we are,  how far we have come and that we should be celebrated too. It can show us that we are worthy of more and push us forward.

When you see others win, you realize that you deserve more too, that you can grow as well, your time may come later but you are still worthy of your heart’s desire if it lines up with your destiny.

This is something that I have been working on for a while and it really has kept me on goodcomparison3track. I do not have envy in my life. I feel good about who I am becoming. I spend less time being self-deprecating (not all the way there yet- this will be a long journey for me) and it feels good to have less negative emotions flowing through me.

After comparing yourself, you may look yourself in the face and affirm your values, your own worth, and even bigger, what you want out of life.

In the book, Ego is the Enemy, Ryan Holidays says, “Stare at it until you can. Only then you will understand what matters and what doesn’t. Only then can you say no, can you opt out of stupid races that don’t matter, or even exist.

goodcomparison5Stare at it…

Look at it…

Soak in it…

Own your feelings! The more we look at other people and compare our movements with theirs, we will look at where we are and where we wanna be. You will understand what matters to you and what doesn’t. You will learn your worth and act accordingly…

Health Minute: Celery

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When my babies were smaller, I used to love making “ants on a log” …that was their celery4favorite snack. “Ants on a log” is easy to make and is a tasty and healthy snack. All you need is celery, peanut butter, and raisins. BOOM! They didn’t even know how healthy that was..hehehehehe

Now that they are older, unless celery is in a recipe, I do not even purchase it very often…not until recently when I was refreshed on its benefits and how it can change your body.

They say that celery is made up of mostly water and holds no nutritional value. This iscelery2 not true! Celery provides us with a few health benefits.

Now, celery is made up of 95% water, that’s true but it is a vegetable that is very high in fiber,  which aids in digestion and promotes regular movement (we all need that!). When you eat it in combination with whole foods that are high in fat and protein (hello peanut butter, hummus), it is said to help you lose and maintain weight because it helps to keep you feeling fuller longer…..hello!

Celery has phytonutrients, which have anti-inflammatory properties. I usually looked to turmeric for this but that is a bonus. Phytonutrients are good for your liver function as well.  It’s also packed with essential vitamins and minerals including folate, vitamin B6, potassium, vitamin K, and vitamin C.

celeryIf it is gonna benefit you like this, why not reintroduce it into your diet, I am! I actually wanna try it with hummus…I have never tried that because I can’t get past the look and the fact that I am a mom who nursed all of her children (baby poop)…but I am going to give it a go and see what happens.

Don’t forget that because it is made up of mostly water, it is a good source for hydration. We have to drink lots of water, especially during the summer. Staying hydrated is going to give us energy, keep our skin looking good, rids the body of toxins, and keep us from passing out in this heat because of dehydration.

So give celery another try….Here are some other benefits….

  • Lowers inflammation
  • reduces high cholesterolcelery1
  • treats high blood pressure
  • fights infection
  • cures bloating and improve digestion
  • reduces the risk of UTIs
  • boosts your immune system
  • improves your mood
  • fights cramps
  • reduces blood sugar
  • improves eye health
  • boosts energy and brain health

let’s go!!

The Hulu Original Shrill

ShrillOh My Goodness!!! So I ran into this show browsing through HULU. Now I was definitely not expecting it to be so good but I started with episode 1 and did not stop until the last episode. There were so many funny moments and unexpected ones as well. What I really LOVE about the show is the main character, Annie. She wants to change things in her life but her body is not one of them. She is a plus-size woman that is trying to start her career and has to deal with a perfectionist boss. Meanwhile, she has a sick parent, she’s juggling a few bad lovers, and all the while trying to embrace her size and love the skin she is in.

This show made me smile, cringe, cheer, and drop a tear or two because it is so relatable. We now live in a time where we are beginning to Shrill3acknowledge the plus size community and this show is confronting all of the bad blood that was so present in the past…even still today. 

This show definitely reminded me that although I am not picture perfect to everyone, I definitely belong in the place and space I am in. I still struggle with being completely comfortable in my skin but when I saw Annie “get free” in the pool scene, I saw myself. Sometimes we Shrill2just have to say, F$%k it!!!! This summer I am coming out of my thoughts and rocking my clothes. You know, the ones we buy, try on at home, but never wear them outside because we are worried about the judgement of petty people. The dresses and swimsuits are coming out of hiding! 

Shrill will bring you out of your shell and let you see that you are perfect just the way you are. We all want to get to the point where are comfortable in our own skin, not wishing that we had someone else’s.

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If you have ever felt unattractive or have had someone insult you about your size, you will absolutely love this show. Annie is a hero that speaks up boldly and honestly and touches the heart of all who is listening. This show is hilarious, brave, sad, and triumphant as it takes on culturally sensitive topics like casual sex, birth control, body shaming…even abortion. It is refreshing and honest and I cannot wait to watch season 2!

 

Satisfied

sunset beach people sunrise

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

We work hard. A lot of us go beyond our “day” jobs to look for the next big thing to work on or area to improve in our lives. This can be in our professional or in our personal lives. Does this sound like you? I believe this is a lot of us. The question is, are we going about it the right way?

img_4075Being happy and satisfied is all in the attitude. We can be in pursuit of things that make us happy, but we should also learn to be happy where we are…right now…today, at this moment.

So what do you want to do? Do you want to learn how to play the piano, learn a new language, or even write that book? Because of how our minds work, we think about these things and sometimes move on to the next thought so quickly that we do not even take the time to put a possible plan in place. If you are like me, you do not want to waste any of your days doing things that don’t get you moving in the direction of the things that mean the most to you.

Every little step we take toward our ultimate goal is one that should be celebrated. We should think about and celebrate every win. Take a moment to appreciate your effort, soak in the accomplishment. Be happy with what you have done at that moment.

If we are always looking at what’s ahead (or what we want to be/have in the future), we miss what is happening today. This means that we are not even living in the present. WeIMG_6426.JPG do not have the future yet, and the past has already come and gone. The present is what we know is guaranteed so we should want to be in that moment; enjoy and be present in this very moment. You are missing out on the beauty of today is you spend every moment thinking about the future.

Being in the moment isn’t saying that learning new things is unnecessary or telling you not to look forward to your future, because you really should.  I am just saying that if we forget that we are living life right now, not too many things can change in the future. Who wants to spend all of their time just chasing something better? That means you will never be happy and “happiness” will always be a moving target for you.

What have you really worked hard for recently? Once you had that achievement under your belt, did it feel as good as you thought it would? Is it because you were already working on the next step and did not pause to celebrate your accomplishment? We should be happy with what we have at this moment while we are working toward what we ultimately want.

Those small wins may not seem too important because they are a means to an end but we should make an effort to appreciate those steps toward our ultimate goals. When negative things occur, we should try to see the lessons, not blame ourselves or others, img_6031and find ways to succeed at that thing the next time.

We have to do some self-evaluations. We should take time before our day really starts to think about what would make “this” day perfect. (note to self..and you…do not let the opinions of others matter too much with this though). Write down what you are working on that is a step in the directions of your goals. How do you spend your day and who do you spend it with? What truly can you say makes you feel content/satisfied?

Every year I sit down and evaluate my year. I do not make resolutions but I do look at my life and how I spent my time. Just like you balance your bank account, we need balance in our lives. We can see what/who is adding to our accounts (emotional, physical, spiritual, mental), what is taking away. You can ask yourself what you need to do more of, less of, completely stop or add something totally different to increase your happiness and satisfaction.

However you decide to balance your life, do it for yourself. Yes, self-awareness and how others see us is important to our growth….we also had to make sure that we do not do things to make others like us or be accepted in a circle. Work on you because you really want to see you in a different light. While you are working on improving, make sure to stop and enjoy the sunshine on your face….today. Be satisfied with what this moment has for you.

woman stands on mountain over field under cloudy sky at sunrise

Photo by Victor Freitas on Pexels.com

Taking This and Leaving That!

2019We are here…standing right at the end of our year, 2018. It was an interesting year, that is for sure. It did bring a lot of heartaches, but it also brought some of the most beautiful moments of my life. I have learned so much from so many new “friends” and experiences and…I am so thankful for the additions and subtractions of 2018.

I know a lot of people are making New Year resolutions, but I stopped doing that to myself years ago. I do not want to keep promising myself things and breaking the promise at the next available moment. It is important to me that something changes every year; that I grow in some way toward being a much better woman. 20192

Our homes are full of things that we have collected over time. Whether we brought those things in, or someone stopped by and dropped them off, our homes are full or both what we need and what we can live without.  Just like our hearts and minds…full of things we can use going forward and those other things that need to be discarded in order to be lighter on our feet going into the new year.

There are so many treasures in your “home”. Think about it, the happy endings, the belly laughs, the new relationships/friendships, the sweet intentions you had for others and others have had for you…all of the YESSES! You have had times when you were kind to yourself, fought and stood up for yourself, have shown your strength and tenacity and have attempted with success to be good to many people. When you think about those things, these are the things that you should take with you into the new year.

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On the other hand, we have a whole lot of mess in our “homes”. We have the things that are obvious and those things that we have swept under the rug. No matter how much we have swept and dusted the common areas that everyone can see when they come in, we have clutter!! Clutter that we hide in the closet, under the beds, in some dark corner or attic. Let me jog your memory…Do you remember all of the negative things that you have said to yourself this year? What about the ugly things you have done to yourself or you allowed others to do…you ate some bad food, over-worked, under-slept, and you allowed people to treat you like less than you are worth and/or be toxic toward you in your personal space. Let’s leave these things behind and move onward and upward!!

20194Now, I am not saying completely clean it all out because we don’t want to get rid of the lessons that came with all of those negative things, We have some memories that we are now fond of, qualities and characteristics that were earned the hard way, and plenty of lessons we need going forward. We have to take our time and sort through, think through it all and keep what will be beneficial.

It is time to face this new year with excitement and motivation. Sure, you can make a new year resolution or two….or twenty. Just make a promise to yourself that you can work with daily, for a long period of time. Take it one day at a time and put you first every once in a while. After that “home” of yours is cleaned up, it will feel bigger and will have room for what 2019 is going to bring. Be aware of everything and live with intention. Try not to miss a thing!!!

Blessings to you and Happy New Year!!

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