Strategic Silence

strategic silenceI have a lot on my mind. I have a lot to say, but I am not a talker. I am not into wasting words. On the other hand, I am truly turned on by real conversation! I love having conversations that stimulate the mind, make you think, and cause growth. Small talk is not my thing. I tend to limit my conversations with individuals that are known to have long, small talk conversations. What do I mean by small talk? How are you? How is your mom…dad…children…job…cousin…your grandmother? Did you see that rain? What are you eating? Cooking? How bout those Mets?!! Blah, Blah, blah. I try to save my conversations for times when I believe I will get something deep back, something with personality. So I am what I call strategically silent.

I am somewhat of an outgoing person. I love meeting new people and learning about different cultures and upbringings. I thought that everyone would be that way. Many people, I find, like meeting people for selfish reasons or to look for someone to judge, I just to learn and love people. I will basically talk to anyone for a short time. I was never afraid of that. My mom told me that I would say Hi to anyone who made eye contact with me. When I was young, I was not afraid to just be Cher, with no apologies. strategicsilence2Becoming an adult has  given me a chance to experience many people who criticize and judge my decisions. When you have a lot of judgement and negative things said to you, you change your mind about some decisions and find yourself following everyone’s advice. I was guilty of that on occassion. The longer I live, the more I realize that I am the only one living my life. I want to do it my way. I want to spend my days without regret, for me. I am a full-grown woman now!! I use the criticism of others to push me toward what I truly want. It is not the only thing I use but it is definitely part of it. I used to argue with my haters about what I want to do…can you believe that? Haters don’t understand your drive or your hustle. They want to have the guts to do what you do and they don’t like themselves because of it.

Being quiet brings on the small-minded people who wanna bring on “the hate”. They think I think too highly of myself or that I may have an agenda of some sort. The haters exist for a reason. They are conditioned by society to think and feel a certain way and if anyone “colors outside of the lines”, they don’t understand so they believe that it is their job to bring on the criticism, set you straight. Some people just can’t see things beyond their own little world. strategicsilence7They waste all kinds of energy trying to tear others down instead of doing what makes them happy. They can be working on making their mark on the world epic but instead, they would rather work against themselves while bringing negativity to you. Haters gonna hate!! Let them!!

Use the hate that those negative people bring your way for motivation for you to go harder after what you want in life. I know that it includes happiness and Peace, for me it does. They don’t have to believe in you! Cut you down? Let them try. Its not what they say that makes you who you are, its what you believe about you. What is your perception of you? You cannot feel bad about yourself or think negatively about what you are doing and be successful. And you sure won’t be successful caring too much about what others are saying when they criticize you. Let it all be fuel for the fire in you that drives you to win!

You are responsible for you, what you feel and how you think. Take responsibility for where you are trying to go and focus on the steps you have to make on your journey. strategicsilence4Use everything along the way to help you learn and grow, even the negative things. Don’t worry about comparing yourself to others. Be your own competition! Run your race. Hear what the people who you love and trust have to say, yes, but trust yourself, love on you more. Gain a drive to see your dreams come true so strong that nothing and no one can convince you to change your mind or quit.

You are not going to please everyone no matter how you do things so don’t try. You are the one who matters. Don’t worry about being liked by everyone and don’t take their dislike of you personally. That is their issues, not yours. Their shade that is thrown at you is really them exposing their insecurities…oooppps! That is their character showing. Know your truth so that their comments don’t break you. You define your life so know that what they think and say is more about them than it is about you.




3 Comments Add yours

  1. Amy says:

    I love this! So much! I can’t stand small talk. Although it has its place, no substance conversation has no place in my life! 👍

    1. dgsunshyne91 says:

      I know right??!!! I can only give it a few minutes and I’m jumping ship. Lol

      Thank you for reading 😍

      1. Amy says:

        Hahaha! Yesss. Like a car in hyperdrive! My pleasure, it was a great and endearing read! 💕

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