“To be given the gift of life is extraordinary and the best thing we can do is live it as fabulously as we can.” -Alex Kingston

Most people will never actually experience true success. Why? Because they are unwilling to actually take over the position of CEO of their life. They allow others to control what happens and what doesn’t happen in their lives.

Why are so many of us unwilling to take risks, to fail in public, and to have to start over after falling down? Some are just not willing to give up what is good for something GREAT! Let’s just say, some just cannot see giving up their “normal” life.

Giving up your “normal” life is not gonna be easy or painless, if you choose to. If we are looking to have an extraordinary life, we are gonna have to trade in what we are comfortable with. The journey of growing up…evolving…succeeding is more than likely going to be painful at some point.

The more we evolve into better versions of ourselves, the more comforts we may have to give up. We are going to look at our lives and reconsider the company we keep, the food we eat, how we spend our time and the things and people that we entertain. Giving up some of these things may sting us a little but in the long run, they won’t be missed because you will be too busy enjoying the fruits of your hard work and sacrifice. Most people just are not willing to give up those things for something better. It takes work; everyone is not there for it.

I took the Financial Peace class that Dave Ramsey has out not too long ago and his quote I can still hear in my head, ” Live like no one else, so later you can live like no one else.” This is a process but can be done. It is not easy but I have no regrets so far. I have had to start my financial freedom journey over many times but I am getting closer and closer to getting it right.

In order for any of us to be on the path to living an extraordinary life, we have to admit to our faults and what we need to give up. I had to finally admit some years ago that I did not have all of the tools I needed in order to “fix” the things in my life that needed to be fixed nor did I have the strength to leave places and people that were no good for my growth. I made the choice to go get counseling and it helped sooooo much! Over the past few years, I have been going through some tough emotional recovery from my past. There was a lot of emotional baggage that I was carrying around and I was making decisions in my present life based off of those hurts…a huge downward spiral! If I can be real with you now, my past was full of broken relationships, shame, guilt, and self-loathing and I did a good job covering it up with smiles and kindness toward everyone but myself. Going to counseling was one of the hardest struggles for me but it was one of my greatest decisions. I do still struggle , of course, but I can live an extraordinary life because I have dealt with my mess and stop letting it call the shots in my life.

I realized that if I wanted to live an extraordinary live, I would have to confront and resolve all of the things that kept me from doing it. We all have things that have happened in our past that may keep us from living our best life. Some of us deal with those things right away, others rather throw a blanket or band-aid over them and keep moving. That’s a sign of a “normal” life.

” Good is the enemy of great. And that is one of the key reasons why we have so little that become great. Few people attain great lives, in large part because it is just so easy to settle for a good life.” – Jim Collins.

You have to give up something in order to accomplish something else. If we want that extraordinary life, we have to look at what we need to give up in the short-term in order to have the life we dream of. It may mean giving up your favorite foods, seeing certain people in your life less, leaving a job, declining an opportunity, or even letting go of watching porn to connect with people. Who knows? You know!

All great opportunities costs us “good” ones.

We can’t have a normal life and an extraordinary one at the same time. You can’t have both; you have to choose.

3 things that I think most of us have to give up to have an extraordinary life.

1. Security and Certainty. We all love our safety nets and the security we feel when we are living our normal life. We love our steady paycheck, the unhappiness of that 10 year relationship, that 9-5…. We don’t have to live this way forever though. If we give up the mundane things, not saying life will be perfect, but you will have more control over your life and actions, especially at the costs of having others calling the shots in your life. Take a risk and start writing that book or blog, start that business, go on a date with him/her…go on an adventure.
2. Fear of Judgement. It is funny how if you post, ” I got the job” as your Facebook status, you will get lots of likes. If you post, ” I finally started my own business.” you will not get nearly as much engagement. Why is that? Most people are afraid to see someone achieve the dreams that they never did. You may be doing something they have only talked or dreamed about but never made a move. When they do not support you, they are more than likely protecting themselves from acknowledging that failure. They may not understand why you chose to leave the comfort and safety of your normal life… to live in an inconsistent, wild, frightening life full of uncertainty…and freedom. They will judge you, criticize and condemn you…you have to ignore them and keep reaching! Separating ourselves from the herd can be scary but we have to believe that we can do what we say we can.
3. Someone else’s definition of success. Everyone’s definition of success is not the same. To most people, it has a lot to do with lots of money, fame, and possessions. There are many of people who have all of those things and more and still have empty and miserable lives. We see it all of the time when a celebrity is lost to drugs and suicide. No one can define your success but you. You will never reach your success if you allow others to define it. Define your own success and achieve it.

So really it is up to us to figure out what we need to sacrifice in order to have an extraordinary life. There is no concrete way for things to happen. The only thing we do know is that we have to make room for extraordinary. That means we have to let go of “okay”, “good” and comfortable.

Our relationships, finances, health, passions and our purpose being elevated all depend on us and what we make room for. The cost is gonna be great (as in big) but it will certainly be worth it….