Spring Cleaning 

March 7, 2017

Cher Gilroy


 

Out of all four seasons, Spring has to be my favorite. Yes, it is my birthday season, but there is just something about the season that makes all things seem new. Winter is a dark, grey time of year. It is cold outside and the days are shorter. It seems to make people sad and depressed after they get through the holiday time. When spring arrives, we get a little more rain and it warms up, the flowers begin to bloom and people are a little more friendly because everything seems brighter. Leaves and grass are green and sprouting, nature gives us more color to enjoy, and the birds!! The sound of birds singing…one of my favorite parts of spring.

Now, I am not saying that spring doesn’t come with its own set of problems like mosquitoes, flies, and allergies to name a few. For the most part, Spring brings more joy, and a desire for fresh starts and clean homes. 

I don’t think there is a more satisfying thing to me, as Spring approaches, than the annual clean up. Cleaning any time of the year for some is like facing the devil, but for me it is a sweet love affair. It brings me so much joy to have everything in my home feel fresh and new and organized once again!! My home does get cleaned all year, I just do a lot of purging when Spring comes, you know, so that I have room for my next purchases (smiling). This season is all about new beginnings so as we clean out our homes, we need to take the time to make sure that we check our hearts and do some Spring cleaning in our lives. 

When we Spring clean our lives, we are getting organized and setting goals. I know a lot of people that make New Year Resolutions in January, but why not make setting new goals at the onset of Spring your new tradition, when it is natural to begin anew? It cannot be good to make promises to yourself in the dead of Winter, when you have little motivation, so you are set up for failure. We can give ourselves a better chance at success beginning in the Spring. We still give ourselves time to get bikini-ready, or financially set, or at least on the way. 


 

So I say, let’s get ready together…for that bikini body, for another step toward financial stability, to get our “ships” (friendships, relationships, etc) on the right track. Let us make a real effort to get rid of the dead weight that we have never been happy carrying and love on the people and embrace the things that help us to feel freer, more positive, and make us want to love ourselves even more. It is a hard thing to do but cutting loose all of the things (and people) that are feeding the negative in our lives and prove over and over again to be toxic for our lives so that we can live free and on purpose!!! Every little step we take toward taking our lives back and living a life that we can be at peace with, will help us reach our goals and feel like we are living a full life. Remember that a little can truly go a long way in the grand scheme of things. 

One thing we have to do is do an honest check on our relationships. Are these close relationships serving the good in our lives? Are we in them to compete with others or to serve an agenda? Do not be pressured to be with someone, to be someone you are not, or spend all that you have to look a certain way to society. Meditate, clear your pretty little mind and look at these relationships and call it quits when you know that you are done with losing! This means your friends as well. Toxic friends cannot serve the positive in your life and ultimately steal what is left of your joy. Now, it will definitely be hard to rid yourself of your “friends” but if you think about it and the whole friendship has been a struggle, the time means nothing when you have only been in a struggle for the majority. Be sweet and back up!! You will thank yourself later and use that energy toward someone or something that feeds the sweetness in your life. There are people we have in our lives we do not dare call friends, but they are acquaintances… ditch those poisonous ones too!! You know, the ones that call you, can’t even say hello before they start throwing up all of their issues. Then when they have drained you and your advice, they hang up!!! They never even said hello! How are you? GET RID OF THEM…. OK easier said than done if people consider you sweet, but learn how to be a little sour, just enough to back away from the drama. We can use this time to touch on the FB “friends” too. Clean up that friends list. People that are constantly posting negative comments about their lives or the lives of others all of the time can really wear you out..and that is just from reading them. Try to minimize the people who do this so that you are not visiting your page and leaving there pissed off or bummed out every single day. 

I am not going to talk about anyone on this one because I am so guilty but when was the last time you cleaned out that closet? Yeah, me too!! We can get rid of something in there. Clothes that we have not seen or worn in over 5-10 years or old purses or shoes (did I say shoes?) we know that we are not going to touch. If it doesn’t make you feel feminine and sexy, or even slightly amazing anymore, get rid of it! It always makes me feel better to clean out my closet. I also feel the same way about my work-space and homeschooling classroom. It feels like I am de-cluttering my brain too. 


 

What are you eating? Is it healthy enough to say that it is helping you Spring clean that body? If not…it must GO! We have to attempt to focus on what we are putting in our bodies. We will not do it perfectly every day but we can at least make the effort. Also, have you detoxed lately? We should do some kind of detox at least 2-3 times a year just to clean our systems out. And this one is free, get some sleep. I mean really, go to bed. I am not good at that one either because I am a thinker by nature but I am working on it for goodness sake (with a cheesy, innocent smile). 

Finally once you take the time to do some de-cluttering, you will have time to fit some “you” time in. I am all about getting some “me” time in. Take a bubble bath in that super clean garden tub, read a good book, or just silence everything and enjoy some quiet, whatever you do to recharge. Just do not make the mistake of allowing everything that you did to “clean” up your life sneak back in. We can always try anyway. In a perfect world, everything would stay clean…then how would we get ready for Spring?

Beauty Break-Are you buying your sunglasses according to your face shape?

April 4, 2017

Cher Gilroy


 

Spring is here! I do wear sunglasses throughout the year but something about Spring and Summer makes me want to put in a little extra effort to look HOT. I own quite a few pair of sunglasses and I don’t always take the time to try them on, before I buy them, to see if it is the right one for my face. Therefore some of my purchases have not seen the light of day. If I am going to be honest, I don’t always try clothes on before I buy them either. Don’t judge me!!! I am getting better at that now. Even when I am not dropping pounds, weight is shifting and inches are leaving so I need to practice that more. Okay, so after a little bit of research, I found out that certain faces look best with sunglasses that have a particular frame. This changes up my shade game for the sunny seasons… yes it does!

To find a flattering frame for your face, you have to know what your face shape really is so take a look in the mirror and learn that. Knowing the shape of your face helps with contouring, and hairstyles as well so it is good to know. That is more ammo for you to have so that you can choose what works for you to enhance your beauty and rock the runway that is your world.

First of all, you have to know your face shape. Stand in front of a mirror and take a look. Is it…?
 

Round. Your face will have noticeable curves and little defined angles. Your ideal eyewear should have little or no curves. The sharp lines will help to elongate your face and make it look thinner. We all are ultimately going for the pair that will make our faces look thinner aren’t we? 

Square. A square face is about the same length and width around the face. It may be characterized by a broad forehead and jaw line. If you have a square face, you should look for round or oval shaped eyewear to help round out the sharpness of your features and cause a more balanced look. Aviators, butterflies, round or similar to those will work for this shape. 

Oval. You have a gently rounded face with even features. Oval face is the ideal face so if you have this shape, you can wear any frame! And we are so jealous of you…Because your features are for the most part symmetrical, try not to cover them too much with super huge frames. 

Oblong. This is a long, narrow face with little to no angles or rectangular. If you have this shaped face, you can go for the oversized frames. Vintage style frames really look good on you because the angles and boldness sharpens your look, giving you sexy and edgy slayage; yes, I said it!!

 Heart. Heart-shaped faces are sometimes called triangular; you are wider at the temple area and slimmest at the chin. Try to avoid sunglasses with straight lines along the top or you are going to look even wider up there. You can have a frame that is wider on the lower edge because it bring the attention lower and make you face appear longer and more balanced. Go for the rimless, aviators or the butterfly styled frames to bring out your fancy. 

Diamond. If you have this shaped face, you are widest at your cheekbones and narrow at your forehead and chin area. Look for frames that have soft curves and no wider than your cheekbones. Go for the oval or rimless frames, they can’t fail you. 
 

Picking out the right sunglasses is not really as easy as seeing the cute pair and purchasing them. There are so many styles and colors. To look your best, you have to dig a little deeper and we have a start now. So try them on!! Check the mirror, smile, frown, do your “fish” pout selfie faces. Make sure that you feel like a movie star and go hit the sunshine. Paparazzi is waiting!

Expectations or NAH? (that was for my sister ;-))

OK, so there is something that I have had on my mind for a minute and I am soliciting some other thought on the subject. Should we have expectations for the people that are closest to us? The people that are closest to us are the only ones that can really disappoint us. These are the people that we have made an investment in. They are the ones that we think are doing the same in us. When our loved ones do things that we believe are “out of character”, we are hurt, frustrated. We need to think about it though, are they really acting out of character or are they just doing what comes naturally? When I was thinking about this, I thought about when we paint a wall. We may have one color on the wall when we move in but if we don’t treat the wall with primer or whatever, the original color bleeds back through; I think that it is the same with people. If they have presented themselves one way from the beginning, they can show you another side of them and change your mind about their character but eventually, the real person is gonna begin to “bleed” through. We all will eventually be true to ourselves because you tired of being someone else at some point.  Anyway, that is just my opinion, I want to know what other think about this. At your job, the company has expectations for you to grow the company and you lose out when you do not meet them. Should we have expectations in our relationships or should we just let a person be who they are? Do you communicate your expectations in the beginning or whenever they change to avoid drama and disappointment?

Reasons and Seasons

As I progress into a full grown woman, I realize that my needs have really changed. My need for certain foods, clothes, entertainment…. even my needs in relationships have changed. I just recently celebrated by 41st birthday and I am celebrating myself more often because for one, I do not look 41, and I look back at the things and people that I was involve in/with and I am so thankful that God has done many “spring cleanings” in my life. Yeah, my body has changed (believe me, I have been working hard on that one lately). I have three of the most beautiful young men (inside and out) hanging out and growing up with me, and like I have said a million times before, they teach me far more than I am teaching them. Anyway, one thing that I am learning about is my need for relationship. We are supposed to have relationships, I understand that. As a young girl, I KNOW that what I was looking for then, is definitely not what I need now. My friends had to be funny and popular because I was not. Today, I know I need honesty and presence, people that have dreams that I can help to see them realize. That is just who I am. Love to see others succeed, although I admit that lately, I am wanting to push more for my own dreams for a little bit.  I am not the most physically attractive woman, but I have lots of confidence in myself, so much so that I can carry myself in a way that will make anyone believe that ALL of my stuff is put together well!! Its a gift and yet it is who I want to really be so I will continue on until it is who I am and I am not far from that woman. I am not a woman that feels so badly about herself that I would get involved with a man who I know will hurt me because I know that is not what I deserve. I have never dealt with this but I have seen it so many times: just because he is a good “pipe layer” and might make a few pretty babies is no reason to sell your soul and give up a lifetime of happiness. Just being real… You should look for a mate that has similar hopes and dreams and wants more out of life than a tax deduction. Your uterus can only stand so much of that and the government only acknowledges the first three. Unless you know in your heart of hearts about the deep, penetrating love that God has for you, you won’t fully love yourself; if you do not love yourself, what in the world can really give away that someone will truly feel and know that it can be mistaken for nothing else but love. Get some confidence, so much so that the people that may want to prey on your weaknesses CAN’T approach you, and the ones that will pray with you can’t resist you.

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Where’s the LOVE?

Sometimes I wonder what people are thinking. They see you working hard to take care of yourself and your business, claim they are your best/good friend, yet they do not support you. They know your occupation, yet they seek their needs outside of you. If you see a person trying to build and do something positive, why not support them? Especially if you are someone that they call a friend, prove yourself. What do you think of these people? Do you think they may be jealous of your success, great or small, and that is why they look the other way as you climb the ladder? I do not like to see things like that. Everyone has different gifts. Just because you are not successful in your lane right now does not mean that you should not support a friend. If you call yourself a friend, you should be first in line to support them. You should be shouting to everyone you know about what they are doing and get some more support for them, you know they would do the same for you. That is definitely something I hate to see between women. Support your girl/boy  in her/his endeavors. Yes,  she might be more beautiful to others, or he is sporting a more muscular physique… Or they have more education but you have your beauty and success and you need to be confident in what you are working with. Nothing uglier than a man/woman who does not even know someone saying, “I don’t like her or him, I don’t know why, its just a feeling.” I know what it is…the green-eyed monster!!!!! You do not know what it took for that man/woman to get that body, those clothes, hair, beauty or whatever it is. Drive in your lane, get YOU right so you can stand in the presence of other great women/men and still be feeling yourself…..

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Light and Bright!

A couple of days ago, I went to purchase my seaweed soap from the health food store (yes, it is very good for getting the toxins off of the surface and cellulite as well) and the lady was telling me about all of the benefits of coconut oil. Because I am a natural head, I am always looking for a way to keep my hair looking shiny and healthy without using a bunch of product. She spoke to me about something called oil pulling and how it would whiten you teeth and freshen breath, along with many other benefits. This is an ancient remedy that cleans and detoxifies teeth and gums naturally

. white teeth : Mouth and teeth before and after whitening

 

The process entails the oil being swished around in your mouth for a short period of time (20 minutes is not really short) and spit out, not into the sink because it may clog it. The oil has the capability to cut through plague and remove toxins without harming your teeth and gums, improving oral health overall. It was started in India thousands of years ago and has been used in the United States since the 1990s. There are hundreds of people that have raved over what oil pulling has done for their skin condition, arthritis, headaches, and hormone imbalance to name a few. Because bacteria and infections can enter the blood through the mouth and can affect the heart, this does make sense to take extra special care of your mouth and in turn, have an impact on other parts of the body. For all of the benefits that it brings, it is worth a try, especially because of how inexpensive it is. In this process of oral detoxing, you may experience the same symptoms you do when you detox to include headaches, mucus drainage, and congestion and they say that it is not suggested for pregnant women. I say we should check it out and see what happens. We can add this to the many things we are trying in an effort to live “Clean”.

Love

This weekend, my boys were so loving and gave me more attention than they have in a long time. It made me think of how much God loves me, even when everyone else forgets all about me.  The way our children love us seems to be the closet thing to what we get from God. They are yelled at, and given unfavorable attention from parents all of the time, yet they LOVE. Of course, a lot of parents are on a mission to teach their children and raise them to grow up and be productive members of society; some of us even want them to have the ability to add to the Kingdom of Heaven so we raise them in a Bible-based home.  My “kings” are being raised to know that I have their best interest at heart and I will do all that God gives me the ability to do to give them the best life possible. When I love on my children, I am loving God because they are one of the ministries that God has given me. Without knowing, they are doing the same for me. I will never sacrifice their safety or needs to meet my own or anyone elses’. I truly love them so I will take risks to see them grow and be happy. That is what God does for me. Even though He knows that I am going mess up each and every day, He risks Blessing me again showing me that He loves me even when… I will never have a friend or family member that will not be angry with me for something because I cannot please everyone. Some of them may even stop speaking to me for not complying and being the person that they need me to be (and that is true to this day). I KNOW that my boys will get upset and disappointed with me too but they will love me…they will choose to overlook the moment to continue their ministry…loving their mommy. That is how they are being raised. That is just what I need from them. That is what everyone needs…truly unconditionally loving people in their lives that they can risk loving back. The best thing that happened to me this weekend was waking up and laying in my bed was my 14 year old son at my feet… Image