I am someone who loves to help others. I want others to be able to have the strength and encouragement to get through anything. The ability to help people feel better is a gift but not one that many people have. It is not normal by a long shot, I had no idea! I was told that I am an Empath, and she told me that the proof of that is that I am always having to explain my thoughts and feeling to other people. An empath is someone who is affected by other people’s energies, and they have an innate ability to intuitively feel and perceive others. It is much more than being sensitive and its not limited to emotions. An empath can feel physical sensitivities, spiritual urges, and can have the ability to know the motivations and intentions of others. You cannot learn to be an empath, you either are or you aren’t. For some reason I believe that my method of communication is clear but I still have to explain what I am thinking and feeling all of the time..(blank face)..it is frustrating!! I am used to it now. It has been an ongoing part of my life experience. I have been in a place where I realize that I have to explain my thoughts and feelings; that most people cannot see my emotions as clearly as their own, especially not when they are deep in their own. Talking to people that are “in” their feelings…..anyway, that is not what this post is about. When I communicate with others, I can feel their struggle or suffering and I tend to want to fix it, or even worse carry all of their baggage for them. Why do I do that?! I mean, I really do not want the pressure of being needed by others beside my boys, and I do not care too much about being liked or wanted. I actually like spending time with myself and the carefully chosen people that I do spend my time with, which is very few. Although, I need to expand my horizons just a bit to glean off of individuals that are already where I want to be.
I have read a couple of books about Empaths and codependency to see why I was getting so frustrated with the individuals I am communicating with. Was it me? What was I doing/not doing that made talking so exhausting and/or draining. Even that line of questioning to myself, is me taking the blame off of them right? It just cannot be them right? That’s me!! But I am working with myself on that one too. I have been told that I can read minds at times. I really do not know how it happens. It amazes me many times and I do not question it anymore. It used to be scary, not so much now though. And I try not to mix my energy with the energy of others. It is important that every person have their own experiences. Sometimes being there to help others can make you a stumbling block to their growth. Being an empath, that is the last thing you want. We do not want to stop anyone from having their time to learn lessons vital to their growth. When I think about that, I back up and mind my own business. I do not want that responsibility! No, not me. I have my own problems and I no longer get involved in anyone else’s emotional drama. Every experience we have, the good and the bad, have lessons for us to learn. I am thankful for all that I have experienced, even the things that threatened to take me out. I am so much stronger because of them.
Feels good when you know that your life’s journey does not have to be taken alone. How have I been getting through? I have been using affirmations to give myself a pep talk when things are trying to get me down. Affirmations are phrases that help you practice positive thinking and self empowerment. Now when I feel that someone needs encouragement or help in their walk, I go to the affirmations that are helping me to push through in the times I need to be empowered. I have plenty of them but I will share 5 of them with you here.
- I release what is not mine to feel. (you can repeat that one a few time to feel it. I have a problem worrying about what other people are feeling more than my own occasionally) You are only responsible for your own feelings and actions.
- What they are feeling is none of my business. Again, I am only responsible for my own feelings and nothing I do can control how they feel. Feelings are a choice. No one can make you feel anything!
- I don’t have to fix everything for everyone. LAWD HAMMERCY! When I started getting that! It is so freeing to know that I am not GOD and I don’t even have to try to be. I am toasting to that one.
- I forgive those who have harmed me in my past and peacefully detach from them. This is some grown woman stuff right here! This I can not say is completely conquered quite yet but I am on my way.
- I am a powerhouse. I am indestructible. When you know this, you handle the trials of life with a different strength, one that is not your own. Nothing and NO One has the ability to take you out of the game.
If you are someone who has affirmations you live by, share them. I would love to learn more. I was taught that for every negative thought I have about me, I should have at least 5 positive things to claim over myself. I am actively doing that and honestly have less negative things to say about myself unless I just feel like being petty that day (smiles).